My neighbours listen to Creed. They also have talkback radio playing at 7.15 am. They seem young and hip, but something has gone horribly wrong. So I grab my Walkman and lie in bed listening to something loud and rock.

Once I went to Napier for my friend’s 21st. I was sleeping on a couch in her lounge. The night of her 21st some random guy who’d showed up at the party had crashed out on another couch. He was snoring so loudly that even listening to my Suicidal Tendencies “Still Cyco After All These Years” tape with the volume right up, I could still hear him. Snore inside my head, indeed.

Today I played my bass and came up with some non-killer riffs which I immortalised on my tape recorder. I call this low-fidelity onbeat (now there’s a crappy injoke).

“You must be Robyn,” said the man at the noodle shop. “Yes, I am,” I said.

But, the question remains: what is the plural of ho?

Leave a Reply