Vanilla yoghurt

If I were a stereotypical LJ’er, I might write a journal entry like this:

Today I had coffee with Emma and Alex. It was really good to see them and catch up. Later Jacob and I went to see a film festival film about a Slovakian prostitute. It was very moving. Jacob and I are thinking of getting a puppy, or going to Melbourne for the weekend.

But because I am Robyn, I will instead write about vanilla yoghurt.

Something that’s caused me much woe is the lack of vanilla flavoured yoghurt in New Zealand supermarkets.

I’ve never really been into the whole idea of combining dairy products with fruit. This probably stems from a traumatic childhood incident involving the uber grandma dessert treat of Wattie’s tinned fruit salad served with a scoop of rock solid, icy Tip Top vanilla ice cream. After the fruit and ice cream have been eaten you’re always left with a soupy mess of melted ice cream mixed with the fruit salad syrup and a few rogue pear and peach chunks. No wonder people fast.

At the other end of the scale, I’ve dined at a few restaurants that have items on the dessert menu involving fruit and dairy products that do seem really nice. Sneaky spoon attacks upon the plates of my fellow dinner companions have shown that sometimes the fruit ‘n’ dairy combinations do taste ok. But all the time, I still prefer desserts to be either dairy/chocolate/caramel/cream-based or fruit based, but not both*. Keep that cream away from my strawberries.

Yoghurt has never brought me much joy, simply because most yoghurt has some kind of fruit flavouring in it. Fruit of the forest? Wildberry? Autumn harvest? Mango Passion? No, not with yoghurt, ok?

But today everything changed. I was at Foodtang browsing in the ghost-faced chilla when I noticed a new six-pack selection of Yoplait Lite called Morning Break. It offered two pots each of three flavours called Caffe Latte, Vanilla Honey and Vanilla Creme. OMG yes. So I picked up two six-packs and I have the following to offer:

Café Latté: Coffee flavoured yoghurt seems wrong, but this is surprisingly ok. Unlike an actual latte, this won’t actually kick you in the pants, but I certainly don’t demand that of yoghurt. As for the name, well café is French for coffee and latte is Italian for milk, but I’m guessing that if Yoplait is “French for yoghurt”, then Café Latté must be French and/or Italian or “coffee flavoured yoghurt.”

Vanilla Honey: It actually tastes like honey flavoured yoghurt. I imagine that if I did yoga I’d sit cross-legged in my yoga leotard and eat this from a small white china bowl. Oh, but it’d probably be soy yoghurt sweetened with real honey. But, as I’ve previously established, my yoga fantasy will never come true, so I’ll stick with the Vanilla Honey Yoplait.

Vanilla Crème: I can accept Franglais when the word creme is involved, especially when the grave accent is used. It’s a packaging description shortcut, used to describe something creamy that has no actual cream. Oh yes, Yoplait Lite Vanilla Crème is excellent. It’s everything supermarket vanilla yoghurt should be.

* The one fruit I will have with dairy is banana. Banoffi pie = yes.

Leave a Reply